Yes, Kids Are Bombarded By Sleaze, But We Must Be Their Role Models

Sydney Morning Herald

Friday May 23, 2008

The media's influence on adolescent sexuality is exceedingly complex ("Saturated with sex: the campaign to save young minds", May 22). As the father of two adolescent daughters I have closely watched their attitude to the sexual imagery with which they are confronted on almost a daily basis. The sleaze that is routinely part of music video clips would not have been broadcast a generation ago without public debate, and it is not pretty to watch.

I believe my teenage daughters are fairly typical middle-class children. They are confronted by much more explicit visual presentations of sexuality than I was as an adolescent in the 1960s. But I can see no evidence that it has influenced their behaviour.

They seem to have inherited their mother's sobriety and caution when it comes to dealing with the opposite sex, despite all the boogie-woogie exhortations to lie down and do it in the road, the shopping centre or anywhere the video clip producers' fancy takes them. Let's hope it lasts.

I remember a few years ago a shocking article in Good Weekend which reported that teenage girls were now routinely performing oral sex on boys to preserve their virginity.

Clearly, teenagers display a wide range of behaviour in coming to terms with their emerging sexuality. We have read more recently about Aboriginal communities where underage sexual activity has become commonplace. There is no suggestion that Dolly or any of the other teen magazines has been the catalyst for what is obviously unacceptable behaviour in those communities.

How an adolescent handles his or her sexual development will be determined by numerous factors but surely the primary determinant will always be their domestic environment. By far the most important ingredient in environment is the family. Mum and dad, mum and her girlfriend, dad and his boyfriend, mum by herself, are the role models who will provide our children with a map of the journey through adolescence.

There is a growing tendency to shrug off responsibility for our children. If they are behaving badly, blame the school's lack of discipline. If they are showing signs of unacceptable sexual behaviour, blame the media.

Parents are usually happy to accept the credit when children turn out well. We should all be aware that peripheral influences such as magazines, television and the movies are secondary to our own role, and get on with the job.

Tony Letford Ashfield

© 2008 Sydney Morning Herald

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